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Menya impamvu abageni bambara amakanzu yera, umugore ajya ibumoso bw’umugabo, urutoki b’ambaraho impeta y’ubukwe, n’ibindi bitandukanye bikorwa mu gushyingirwa

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Umunsi wo gushyingirwa n’umwe mu minsi ikomeye mu buzima bwa muntu, buri wese ugeze kuri uyu munsi agerageza gukora iyo bwabaga ngo agaragarare neza kandi akaba asabwa kugenda y’itwararitse. Hari imigenzo imwe n’imwe ikorwa n’abageni kuri uyu munsi nko kuba umugeni agomba kwambara ikanzu yera, kuba umugore agomba kugenda ibumoso bw’umugabo n’ibindi nyamara batazi impamvu yabyo naho byaturutse, ahubwo bakabikora gusa kuko baziko n’abandi bose ariko babigenza.

Kwambara amakanzu y’umweru kubageni byatangiye kuva 1840 babikuye ku mwamikazi w’Ubwongereza.

Umuhanzi umwe w’umunyarwanda niwe waririmbye ngo ‘ntanakimwe kibaho kidafite impamvu’ kandi koko niko biri, buri kintu cyose kibaho kubera impamvu runaka gifite naho cyaturutse.

Muri iyi nkuru twabakusanyirije impamvu y’ibintu bitandukanye abageni bakora ku munsi w’ubukwe bwabo naho byagiye bituruka.

Impamvu abageni bose bambara ikanzu y’umweru

Mu mwaka wa 1840 nibwo umwamikazi w’ubwongereza witwa Victoria yagaragaye yambaye ikanzu yera ku bukwe bwe.

Ubusanzwe abageni b’icyo gihe bambaraga ikanzu y’ibara ritukura ariko kuva icyo gihe abageni bose bahise batangira kwambara amakanzu y’umweru, ngo bikaba bishushanya ubusugi n’ubuziranenge bw’umugeni.

Indabo umugeni afata mu ntoki

Indabo umugeni afata mu ntoki ku munsi w’ubukwe, mu bihe bya kera ngo isuku y’abantu yari nke bityo umugeni akambara mu mutwe ikamba ry’indabo zihumura.

Uko ibihe bisimburana indabo umugeni yaje kuzitwara mu ntoki. Abandi bakemera ko bwari uburyo bwo kwirukana imyuka mibi. Mu gihe cy’uburwayi umugeni yakoreshaga tungurusumu kugira ngo umwuka mubi yaba yatewe n’uburwayi ntiwumvikane.

Kwambara agatimba

Kwambara agatimba ku bageni byaturutse ku myumvire itandukanye nko gukingira umugeni imyuka mibi n’ibindi.

Mu bihe byo hambere umugeni yabaga ahishe atagomba kugaragarira amaso ya rubanda ngo bamenye amarangamutima cyangwa inenge afite. Akenshi mu bihe byahise hari abashyingirwaga ku gahato cyangwa habayeho kumvikana kw’ababyeyi abana batabigizemo uruhare, bakabashyingira bataziranye umugabo akabona umugeni ku munsi w’ubukwe amutwikuruye ishuka kuko agatimba kari kataraza.

Kwambara impeta y’ubukwe ku kuboko kw’ibumoso

Kwambara impeta y’ikimenyetso cy’isezerano ry’ubukwe (Alliance) ku kuboko kw’ibumoso ku rutoki rukurikira agahera bifite igisobanuro kijyanye n’imyemerere y’Abanyamisiri bizeraga ko urwo rutoki rufite umutsi w’urukundo utwara amaraso byihuse ku mutima. 

Urutoki rwamabrwaho impeta y’ubukwe ngo rufite umutsi w’urukundo utwara amaraso byihuse ku mutima.

Impamvu umugore agenda ibumoso bw’umugabo

Impamvu umugore ajya ibumoso bw’umugabo we bifite igisobanuro cyo kurinda umugeni. Mu gihe cyo ha mbere ubwo umugabo yagombaga gushimuta umugore we, umugabo yashyiraga umugore we ku rutugu rw’ibumoso kugira ngo arwanishe inkota iri mu kaboko k’iburyo.

Byaje kuba umuco umugabo wese agatwara umugore we ibumoso kugira ngo amurinde uwaba atishimiye ubukwe bwabo. Kugera n’ubu umugabo afata umugeni we mu kaboko k’ibumoso.

Guca bugufi ugashinga ivi hasi usaba umukobwa ko mwabana

Guca bugufi usaba umukobwa ko mwabana aribyo ubu bizwi nko gutera ivi, bijyanye n’imyemerere y’abo hambere ijyanye n’umuco w’icyo gihe wo gusenga.

Bikajyana nanone no mu gihe cy’ingabo n’abami aho ingabo zacaga bugufi imbere y’umwami zimuha icyubahiro akwiye.

Kuri ubu rero umusore atera ivi agaca bugufi nk’ikimenyetso cy’uko yubashye umukunzi we kandi ko umukunzi we afite uburenganzira bwo kwemera cyangwa kwanga ko babana. Icyemezo kikava ku mukobwa.

Abakobwa n’abahungu bambarira abageni

Abakobwa cyangwa abahungu (Les filles/garcons d’honeur) baherekeza umugeni bifite inkomoko mu ba romani.

Mu bihe bya kera bemeraga ko habaho imyuka mibi. Niyo mpamvu umugeni yajyaga gusezerana aherekejwe n’abagenzi be bambaye kimwe bityo bikaba uburyo bwo kujijisha kugirango utamenya umugeni uwari we mukumurinda imyuka mibi n’ibyago.

Umugeni kunaga indabo muri bagenzi be / gutanga igifunguzo

Gutera indabo kw’umugeni ngo hagire umwe muri bagenzi be b’abakobwa uzifata bifite igisobanuro cy’uko uwo ziguyeho aba ari umunyamahirwe.

Benshi uwo muhango bawukoraga bakiva mu Kiliziya cyangwa mu rusengero kuko bizeraga ko izo ndabo ziba zahawe umugisha. Umunyamahirwe ziguyeho nawe akazagira ibirori byiza.

Umugabo gutwara umugorewe ibumoso n’igisobanuro cyo kumurinda.

 

 

Ivan Heritier

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